Dear Momma... I Wish You Woulda Told Me "how" To Age Well

 Dear Momma,

I remember how pretty you were; 

young and old.

How you used to dip your finger in that green jar of dippitydo; 

then slide it down a bit of hair in front of your ears and clip those 

cute little curls; just like the rhyme

you taught me before you went "home."

...I remember the older I got...

so did you; always

30 years ahead of me.

You know Momma.. we talked about it so little...

But I watched you and I saw. 

The thing was-...I didn't understand yet?

The wrinkles... they were there.

The thinning skin... and things that hurt that didn't used to. 

The all white hair... fuzzy and rebellious.  

I can still see you roll and roll  that hair with your curling iron.

And after you left; I  kept your brush with the pretty white hairs still in it.  

I still look at it sometimes ... 

and touch the strands of glory.   

If I could ask you now... 

I'd ask... What was it like Momma?

Was it hard for you?

Did you still feel 20 on the inside like I do?

On the inside did you twirl?

When you looked at the younger gals did you wish 

...if only... at least once in awhile?

If only I could wear that little black dress... 

If only these knees didn't sag.

If only these veins didn't look like a map of Tennessee.

The gals  are dying their hair all kinds of crazy colors now Momma- 

you just wouldn't believe it.  Red, and purple... pink too. 

But this aging thing... it runs deep Momma.  Deeper than clothes, and makeup and hair.

I know you know 

what I mean.    

These hands of mine are a dead giveaway of this midlife thing.

They look just like yours.  

The dog; she scratched my arm a couple days ago and 

it bled like a war wound Momma.  

My skin it just tore ... 

it tore like yours did.  

Funny how no one teaches us how to do this circle of life. 

How this aging thing  feels and 

how to grow old gracefully?

And this crazy society Momma ...it tries to tell  you that ya  have to stay young,

-be firm, unwrinkled; and we both know Momma; there's 

just no stopping it 

is there?

I've bought the wrinkle creams Momma- 

and they don't really work.

The hair dye; it colors the greys but 

after about a week... those grey hairs...

I can see them... even still.  

When I get up in the morning Momma...

I limp my way to the bathroom.  

I know now why you kept so many bottles of  ibuprofin in the house.  

It helps doesn't it.  

...I'm trying to get more calcium than you did Momma.  

The doctor told me your osteoporosis is 

something I could get too-  

a little further down the road.

Most of all,

what I remember best Momma was your smile and 

laughter.  I hope I get that too.  

I'm glad you shared alot of yours with me.  

The word says a merry heart is good medicine;

but  I know, you know that already.  

So that's what I'll hang onto today and all the rest of the days of my life

So thanks Momma.  I'm realizing now 

that you really taught me more about aging than I  thought.  

Love,  Leaonie

ps.  I still remember what you taught me ...  

There was a little girl

who had a little curl

in the middle of her forehead

and when she was good

she was very very good

but when she was bad she was horrid.