It was hard.
Myguy and I have been praying about what to do?
We'd been feeding hay and grain to our cows since way back in May.
There is literally no grass, and it hasn't rained in so long. Everything is just burnt up.
Watching our cows try to find something to graze on was sad. They were even eating leaves off trees in the search for something- anything... green.
We realize that even if it does rain now... it will take weeks for the grass to grow enough to sustain livestock and we're just now coming into our usual hot, dry season. Hay is getting scarce and expensive and even if we could find more; ...we can't afford to feed hay and grain to our herd all summer long and then all winter as well.
.... so....last night; I crawled over the gate at my happy place and took this last photo of our herd at dusk.
I walked into their circle, and knelt down awhile... watching them swat flies and chew their cuds. I looked into each of the faces I've come to know so well; ... knowing within hours.. they'd soon be leaving...
--I still felt peace.
This morning, we got up extra early to try and catch them all. Hannah, Rebecca, Popcorn, Oreo, Gertrude, Matilda, Peninah, Marble, Drew the bull, and three heifer calves. Every one of them went in the corral for grain... but one calf. (It seems like there's always one who has to be stubborn.)
Thankfully; Trent came early to help and we finally got the little heifer hemmed up without getting her too riled. See that was still another worry... and problem... the heat.
And today- it's supposed to be 107 again.
Anyways... the man came who was buying them soon after they were all captured and we got everyone loaded safely while it was still fairly cool.
It all felt pretty good, until
the trailer was pulling out from our pasture.
I could feel my tears start welling then as I watched our cows look back at us through the pipe panels ..
I so did not want to cry, and make it any harder on Myguy.
Turning my head I swallowed hard... again and again; as that hot lump grew in my throat.
Myguy and I embraced as the truck and trailer full of our cows clanged and bounced down our dusty driveway.
It was a time to lose..and say goodbye.
15 comments:
Lea, My heart goes out to you. You are a real strong lady. I knew you needed rain but I hadn't realised it was so bad.
I am thinking about sweetie.
Love you.
Jeanie
x
Oh my sweet Friend.My tears are falling for you Brave one. But we can be strong for those we love and do what we must even with a hurting heart. Because our God is so much bigger.
Sending you a big bear HUG!
Your Woolie Pal
Trace
www.grannytracescrapsandsquares.com
Oh honey I'm so sorry, there is nothing harder than saying goodbye.
The heat is the same here, everything is burning up, I'm not sure what the surrounding farmers are going to do. Our summer has only just begun... my thoughts are with you darling.
hugs ~lynne~
Lea,
My tears, hugs and prayers are with you.
Now I'm crying! I am so sorry, Lea! We went through this with my sister's bull -- she had bottle fed that little, scrawny thing and he always thought he was little --- even when he was 1800 pounds! It killed her soul to see him go, and it killed me to see her heart break. She said never again, and so far, she has not had another. We say we won't get attached, but when we start naming them. . . . our heart is in those names, right? My sister's was Floyd. And she cries every time she has a hamburger.
I understand your need to do this. Wish I could have sent you our rain. Seems such a waste of water to see all the floods and ruined homes when others are so dry and parched.
I'll be praying that you find peace and that He will fill that empty place for you! Love you, my gal!
I am crying for you if you dont mind. I feel your pain and tears as they do not become livestock but kinda' family. You have been through so much with them. MY HEART goes out to you and that GOD will replace that loss with something new.
I know, its hot here and only getting worse as the week progresses.
Know I am with you in spirit and keep your eyes and heart towards GOD...He has great things waiting for you.
I can't begin to imagine how your "heart" felt, Lea. Where would ANY of us be w/o an unshakeable faith in God?!? I'm SO sad that you had to come to this place and pray that God will absolutely flood and fill your lives with His presence, peace & joy.
♥ Rebecca
Sending you hugs and prayers.
Such a difficult decision, but I can understand, especially with the circumstances being what they are, and out of your control.
It takes great courage to make the decision that you had to make.
Smiles :)
Kerin
Lea, when I read your posting, I have to admit the tears fell. For I am familiar with cattle, for my former father-n-law farmed and cattle was his love. I have seen when my son was very young and he became attached to the little cows, especially one called "FRECKLES". I know
you are TRUSTING GOD but it still hurts. Praying for rain where its needed and for you and your family. From one sweetie to another....Roxie p.s.~~~your purse is on its way!
Lea, when I read your posting, I have to admit the tears fell. For I am familiar with cattle, for my former father-n-law farmed and cattle was his love. I have seen when my son was very young and he became attached to the little cows, especially one called "FRECKLES". I know
you are TRUSTING GOD but it still hurts. Praying for rain where its needed and for you and your family. From one sweetie to another....Roxie p.s.~~~your purse is on its way!
I am so sorry to hear this-the tears will not stop. My heart goes out to you. Sometimes we don't understand but there are those who are lifting you up--don't feel that you must bear this alone.
Oh my Dear Friend my heart goes out to you. Tears over your loss, and a grateful heart for your looking to Gods promise. I know how much you loved your herd. Beeg Beeg hugs to you, and know I am still praying for some liquid sunshine for you all there. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Gal 6:2
I love you!!!!!
I am so sorry. :..(
I was just fine until I read your post and the tears won't stop!!! Cause I know in my heart of hearts we will have to do the same thing. I say I am ok but really I'm not. We know that they are just cows to some people. But to us they are part of our family. I guess what hurts the most is I know I am losing a part of Dad again. The last part is the hardest to let go of. ):
Breaks my heart... and my lump is huge! Not a good day anyway and now I cannot stop crying...So sorry for your loss and now I pray you find peace.
jc
Post a Comment