Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Focusing on Him and More Love

 Saturday morning Trent dropped off  his three little Musketeers with me for the day.
Remember how I said once that I didn't have a clue how to be a Grandma and tending little ones was "not" my gift???  ... I need to rephrase that one.  -- While me being an actual Grama may not be something I'm all that gifted "in".... these little ones are most definitely absolute  gifts. Oh yea!

I'm "that" girl who when someone was standing nearby with a church nursery sign up  sheet... slinked her way out... even  ducking out the back door and would run  for my vehicle.  How we ever raised two sons of our own points straight to God completely because... babies terrify me.  Oh they're cute and I love their feet alot (grin) but .... usually everytime I picked anybody's baby up  but our own they just bawled their lil heads off.  Your dog or cat would probably love me... but your baby?... Yeah that's another story.     So in the back of my head when it all first sunk in that our son was marrying a woman with three little ones joining the family .... well; God and I did have a conversation where I asked Him about the whole baby thing again. I panicked a little coz the four year old was already calling me Grama Lea.  In my mind though  I could see God smile.  

Today I can testify that .... His ways are better and higher.  
And He already has stuff all worked out.  We just gotta trust him and say yes.  
And thank GOD also that my new daughter in love is as patient with me as these kidlets have been. 
She even trusted me with the baby when they went off to get married. - Well so I thought.  I think now it was more like she was trusting God too.  
But that was such a gift from God and her to me and Myguy.  
Because that's how the bonding all really started.
There were no eyes except God's while we figured it all out.  
-- Not that it's all figured out already.  No... we're still learning each and every day. 
But God's been seeing us all through and growing our love like crazy! 
Not any judgemental love but the real unconditional kind. 
And that's the kind we all want isn't it.

This Saturday the Muskeeters spent the whole day here on the farm.  
All three were sick but Alyssa although sneezing alot felt better than the boys.  
She likes to cook and bake and do all the girl stuff and so we made our first pan of cinnamon rolls together.  It was a chaotic, crazy, wonderful,  blessed,  day. 

The guys came in for lunch and Myguy snuck in the kitchen at one point and stole a quick kiss.  
Alyssa got so tickled and told Trent  she HAD to take a picture coz Gramma Lea and Poppa Mike were ....."kissssssing!"   (For just four years old the chicklet can work an Iphone I'm tellin ya) 

She also had to take a photo later showing
how  she tied my apron strings for me in this good ole knot behind my back. 
It was a good knot.    
 Poppa Mike had to work hard to get me out of my apron.  I wore this  apron straight jacket all afternoon. 

 The boys  were just not up to par Saturday. 
You can just look into poor Carters eyes and see how crummy he felt.  
He traveled from my left hip to the right most of the day coz everytime I'd try to set him 
down he'd squall.  
He's on medicine now and hopefully is feeling  better today.

 Blaine was not himself either.  Usually he'll try to eat you out of house and home.  Literally... because if you don't put something edible in front of him he'll try to eat ya know... coins, magnets... small toys... and licking asphalt tastes kinda good too.  Not  this day.  He felt so puny he slept all afternoon.  Poor baby.  He was so good inspite of it all. 
 So after the dishes were done, and with Blaine in bed; Alyssa wanted to do art. 
Gramma Lea let's do art.  
Let's do journals.
Let's do paint.
Let's do markers.
We did all that... and did alot more too. 
I forgot but after the rolls we even did an apple pie. 
Somehow with Carter on my hip... it all got did. 
Even buttons got did.
My friend Janie told me her Grand loves her buttons and that's something I hadn't pulled out for Alyssa before so I did and she went  giddy wild over them!  I have a very large button collection and was also given Mikes' Grandmas giant button collection on top of it all. 
I heart buttons... and little Lyssa does too.  What joy her button squeals brought.  This one looks like a cupcake, this one looks like cotton candy, this one has stripes, ooooh Grama Lea look; this one is a pink heart!-- more and more and more love.
How does a Grama heart make room for more and more love to keep growing when it's already jam packed? 
 How is it that a day can be so full....
and yet I keep finding more love around every next corner?

 I have no idea really?
It makes no sense.
When we got married at 18; I remember thinking 
I couldn't love this guy more than I already did.
It wasn't possible because I thought our love was huge already.
But every beat of our hearts grew love more.
Through the  births of our sons and watching them grow up, through  illnesses, laughter, ... trials... 
money struggles, celebrations,  tears... ups, downs, twists, turns, moves, ... moments  all spent
Especially; opening the doors of our hearts to let Jesus Christ inside...
He's really the more and most  of all 
of love.  
Our minds can't even begin to wrap around it.  

....that Love thing.
I think I'm realizing  that when the door to my heart gets closed 
its like forgetting to open the window blinds behind 
my potted red geraniums and African violets.
Without light they  starts stunting.
But opened ... love grows into them  and 
 blooms beautiful  too.

Some days ... and especially with some people, my default still wants to keep closed off. 
I've tossed the lock away, but the hasp is still there.  
It still feels safer coz people and life can just get messy. 

At church Sunday the Pastor was talking about our focus? 
He brought up divisions of people and reminded us where our focus needs to be.
Rather; "Who" it needs to be on:   
I know it's true.  
Because the wrong focus 
can shut out love with  blinds and closed doors
  light that stunts 
the good growth.  
I relate because my focus gets
the right "who" pretty easily.   

This new year 2013 my anchor verse is Luke 10:27
 "And he answering said, "Thou shalt love
the Lord thy God with all thy heart,  and with all thy soul,  and with all thy strength,  and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself." 

My three words are:
and Mercy. 

 Funny how looking back on last year; hindsight
points right back to more love.  
From Deuteronomy 6:5... to adding all my strength 
and mind too.  
Then that whole loving your neighbour thing.  
I'm excited.

Sweeping up the floor the other day I came upon this bit of red wool.
The  heart reveals even more 
love around it.

"Create in me a clean heart,  O God;
and renew a right spirit within me."
Thank you for loving me... and revealing
so much love.  
Help me 
 love more.


sweetvintageofmine said...

Afternoon, Lea! Reading your post of LOVE was heartwarming....with all this CHANGE came a GREATER LOVE! I see and feel TRUE LOVE in your family, and with friends abound! Yes, and we must FOCUS on him always-FIRST! You are so encouraging to me~~~Blessings and prayers~~~Roxie

Denise said...

Such a sweet, sweet post.

Sunnyside Up said...

I can't begin to tell you the LOVE I felt pouring from your post! It was like you reached right through this screen to give me a big old (((hug))) filled with the LOVE of Christ! Such a blessing to read about your journey and where God is leading you this year! And catching up!
Can't wait to journey on with you friend!

Sue@CountryPleasures said...

Your back!!! My, how I've missed these kind of posts, straight from your heart!!!! Amazing who one year can change so much, you rock!!! Love that button collection!!

Debra said...

Oh what a beautiful post...I was teary-eyed and smiling and just plain enraptured by this post-it was medicine for me. And then to see that one of your words for this year is 'love'-that's what mine is! I know God means to lead me deeper into what that means-and I'm excited too...Love you so much Lea.

Dee said...

My heart is filled with smiles reading your post and looking at your photo's...Your a wonderful grandma...♥