Monday, May 25, 2020

My Journey To Going Gray-

 Hi friends, 

I've had so many people ask me about going gray and so today 
I thought I'd share a post about my documented journey.  I remember while going through 
it myself I searched out posts like this one for encouragement.  Maybe this will help someone else like me.  

A month before this photo was my last haircut.  I kept a short angled bob for a long time.
My roots grew fast so I always colored it myself.  Clairol nutmeg.  
Our bathroom wall still has the stains from splatters... (I don't miss that) 
Making the decision is step one.  
You decide.  
How bad do you want to stop coloring?  
Some women color til they die.  
For me; it came to the point I just wanted to be me and 
I didn't even know what she really looked like anymore.  
I dreamed of long silver hair and wanted a braid.  
My entire life I had bangs...so  I wanted to grow them out.  
Wasn't sure I could go without bangs... but it was worth a  try.  
With the money saved from haircuts and dye I decided to sponsor a little girl.  
No turning back.  I made that decision... no turning back Leaon.  

 You can tell in this photo I was a little questioning.  
Thankfully I had a very supportive husband.  
At this point no one really said anything... but I promise you as time went on
I was met with opposition and that got kinda hard.  I wear my heart on my sleeve...
always have.  Whoever wrote sticks n stones can break your bones but words will never hurt me ... was a bonehead-

 I was still doing okay here.  
I liked how the new hair sparkled.  
I kept thinking surely soon the old dye would just start washing away 
but it held on ladies...  
Also I remember about here... my scalp felt funny ... I even got two or three 
little pimple things in my hair like my scalp was detoxing.. I wonder if anyone 
else had that... coz I never read that anywhere.  It didn't  last long ... thank goodness.  
 I'm glad I took photos and journaled through it all.  

 New little hairs started growing like crazy!  
My hair was getting thicker and thicker.  
The new ones had a mind of their own.  
They still do but a couple drops of oil like biosilk or any of those helps tremendously.  
I still use that every day to make those little rascals behave.  
 This is month five.  
Please don't be offended by the gun.   I hardly have any photos at month five and we
were out target shooting.  
This time period  was thee hardest of all and didn't let myself get in many photos.   
I felt very insecure.  Also it was this time period where I was met with 
several horrible comments.  I remember being in walmart and saw two older than me ladies 
and both of them had coal black dyed hair.  They were not far from me and kept looking at me 
snickering and it was sooo obvious ... They behaved like mean girls.  I wanted to crawl under a rock.  The old me wanted to march right up to them both and tell them right where to get off but... I didn't.  I just tried to stand a little taller ... and held my little head up ... and went about my business.  

One of my friends made two very snide comments and she too colors her hair and is older than me.
I don't know why people don't bite their tongues ... but you can't control others.... only how you will respond.  I encourage you to think ahead of time.  There are going to be people who put you down.
Don't stoop yall.  It won't help anyways.  
There's more about that in the next photo. 

 Something started  changing on the inside for me at this point.  
 A new strength was happening.  
STRONG GIRL starts taking shape.  I'm serious... 
something inside has a transformation maybe even moreso 
than the outside.  
Also I started being aware of others on the same journey.  If I was out and about 
and saw another woman with a white cap or white streaks... we noticed eachother.
You want to run and knucklebump and hoop n holler for eachother. ha!  Its true.  
One door greeter at walmart who was older than me always pulled me to the side and cheered me on.
The first time she pulled me over she said "Are you trying to do that on purpose?" lol
I said Yes Maam.  She became my greatest cheerleader!  Everytime she saw me she'd 
say... good job!  You're doing it!  Looks great!  
God bless her... she made my day.  
 This photo I shared on a facebook group site.  
I won't say the name but... owner of that site I'm sure was probably mortified because she 
is very girlygirl and I doubt she would let herself go gray in a million years.
However a few others blew me away with with their Wahoooo's!  
They cheered me on and finally I didn't care what anyone really thought of my hair. 
It mattered what I thought... and I was growing a new holy confidence about it all. 
I also had a little crazy braid!  
I remembered a man one time... he was a total stranger and elderly... 
it was in a hospital gift shop:  He said, "You're pretty when you smile." 
I was taken aback.  Can only imagine the surprised look on my face and at first
it felt kinda biting- but ... my heart received it for how he intended.  He meant it as
smiling looks good on you.  I still think of him now and then.  His words...
I receive them with love.  Just smile!!!  And be you.   
 Then this happened.  
She added fuel to my fire. 
I had real granny hair!  

 At this point, alot of people go for a chop.  
I wanted mine to be long so I kept going.  
It started lookin kinda crazy cool.  Then people started sayin they liked it 
and would ask how  do you do that?  Like they thought I colored my hair to get that effect.  
When I'd see myself in a mirror I'd see those dark brown kinda fried ends and think 
"well girl... this is the last of your dark brown hair you'll ever see. Embrace it. "


 I stopped fretting about hair at this point.  
:) 
 Time went on and a cool thing happened.  
I started noticing Myguy's stubble.  
He always had a  moustache but two or three days went by and he wasn't shaving. 
I didn't say a word.  ????   What is he doin?  
Every new day these beautiful silver whiskers were poppin out on him.  
Dangitboy!!!!  My wonderful man was growing out a beard.. and we matched! 
How noble I thought... how good of my sweet man to do that!  His beard has much much more white
than his hair... and omgeeeee... I love it!  It felt like such a good fit for us both. 
That he did that meant so very much to me.  That's love yall.   
This was me when I had my last short hairstyle... all freshly colored..
to my first long braid.  Just as I'd dreamed.  
I'm still not good at braiding and it's easier for me when it's wet like in the photo but 
I made it.  And you can too if that's your goal.  
Just take that first step.  Day one.  Or one day?  
You decide. 


I think this photo was two years ago.  
Instead of a hair cut ... I stopped at the salon and asked if they'd just braid my hair.
It's a treat I like to do every now and then  .. you know when there's not a pandemic.  
In the past year I had seven inches cut off my hair coz it was so long. 
It's grown a whole bunch again now.  I've had Mike trim it one time since then.  
Now maybe I'll just grow it to my butt.  ? 
Anyways... this was my journey.
I hope it encourages someone.  If I can do it anyone can. 
People ask about products to use.... I use cheap old suave clarifying. 
Any conditioner. Sometimes I use purple shampoos to get out any yellowing. 
The biosilk to calm down the rebellion.  

Sometimes I still get an ornery comment.  
It's always from someone older who colors theirs. 
But ... who cares.  This is me and Myguy likes it.  
He's told me... God gave you all that wild n crazy hair... and I love it. 
God also says it's our crown of glory.  
So... who cares whether or not other people don't like it.  
If you want to ditch the dye... I encourage you.  You can do it.  
Get through one day... and keep doing that every day.  
I'm cheering for you. 
Love, Lea 


  

4 comments:

Terra said...

This is a great post about your journey and it is about so much more than hair color. I love that you are using the money you save on hair color to sponsor a child, and that you are an empowered woman who has a gun. Oh, that braid is very pretty. I am a senior citizen and don't color my hair but found this post uplifting.

Jean said...

Good morning Lea, I am amazed that it is so long since you stopped colouring your hair!! I love how you documented the journey, fun to look back on. I too, can't understand why people do not bite their tongues and I agree wholeheartedly about the saying "sticks and stones" coz words really do hurt. I love the facebook photo and the little braid it is sooooo cute and a girly girl should love it too!!

I usually go to the hairdresser to have my grey roots coloured but since our hairdressers have been closed I haven't had my hair cut or coloured since February. The sun has lightened it a bit so I guess it gives me an idea of what it would look like. It will be a while before the hairdressers open, I think maybe July so I will wait and see how it looks by then.

Thank you for sharing your journey and how awesome that your guy supports you too. Yay!!!
Bless You <*(((><

Leaon Mary said...

Hi Terra! Thank you for your kind words... !! I'm almost a sr citizen too! Hope you have a wonderful day!

Leaon Mary said...

Jeanie, ... I've heard several women talk about their roots and not being able to get to the hair salon. You are not alone. Your hair is sooo pretty... I love it!!
Yes I feel fortunate to have a supportive hubby... it sure made things easier when he let his beard grow and it was all salt n peppery. I didn't feel like I stood out so much then.
Well hope all is well there... I wrote you a longer email so hope you find it. Blessings to you too. <*(((><