Monday, April 13, 2009


Greetings and Holykisses,

I'm staring at this blank box today with fresh eyes! They're still the very same, blue, mid-life eyes gazing through bifocal-progressive lenses. But they're in clearer focus because of my massive heart attack over the weekend. Heavy chest pains, that began last Friday morning, from the moment I woke up, and increased throughout my day. I know most of us have heard about the crucifixion for years. But this year was just different for me. This year got really personal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Friday, through Sunday, every time, I thought of "MyJesus," I'd get a visual of His suffering for me. For the first time, it was as if the rest of the world just faded, and it was just Him and me. For me, He was beaten, spit on, whipped, scourged, crowned with thorns, ... and nailed to a cross. For me, He laid down His life, and took on every sin I've ever committed; and I've sinned alot.* For three days, my heart has ached with a newer gratitude than it has ~ever~ known.

I'm re-dedicating my life to Jesus Christ. I'm praying for God to perform an invasive procedure to correct not the hardening of my arteries, but the hardening of my whole heart. Those areas that won't yield and that sometimes refuse to listen to Him. Those deep crevices that hide my pride, my rebellion, and my selfishness. Places where my "will" tends to stick.

I've been on my knees this morning. As I prayed, I asked God to circumcise my heart, and when I did yall, I felt it!

The Word speaks alot about hardened hearts. I know I'm not the first, to have one; the bible speaks of many. I'm guessin I'll not be the last either. There's a verse that caught my attention this morning about it:
"The Lord your God will circumcise your hearts and the hearts of your descendants, so that you may love Him with all your heart and with all your soul, and live." Deuteronomy 30: 6

Jesus laid down His life for me, and today, I'm rededicating my life to Him.
Since the beginning of the year, my anchor verse has reminded me to love God passionately.
"Love God, your God, with your whole heart; Love Him with all that's in you, love Him with all you've got." Deuteronomy 6:5 I do love Him, and today.... I live.

God gave me a song this morning to go with my new heart.
May He touch your life and heart today as well.
God bless you, to all who reads this today. Whatever your need, I pray His will for your life.

Crucified with Christ

As I look back on what I thought was living
I'm amazed at the price I chose to pay
And to think I ignored what really mattered
Cause I thought the sacrifice would be too great
But when I finally reached the point of giving in
I found the cross was calling even then
And even though it took dying to survive
I've never felt so much alive.

For I am crucified with Christ and yet I live
Not I but Christ that lives within me
His Cross will never ask for more than I can give
For it's not my strength but His
There's no greater sacrifice
For I am crucified with Christ and yet I Live

As I hear the Savior call for daily dying
I will bow beneath the weight of Calvary
Let my hands surrender to His piercing purpose
That holds me to the cross and sets me free
I will glory in the power of the cross
The things I thought were gain I count as loss
And with His suffering I identify
And by His resurrection
power I am alive


And I will offer all I have
So that His cross is not in vain
For I found to Live is Christ
And to die is truly gain


LisaShaw said...

O Lea, this touched my heart deeply. May we all fall down on our knees and ask God for a new heart. I stood in church yesterday morning feeling/asking for the same thing. I asked Him to consecrate my heart and make me anew until I look like my Jesus.

You received a beautiful heart transplant. Praise the Lord.

Love you.

From the Heart said...

What a great testimony. To rededicate your life to Christ. We all should do that. On our
25th Anniverary my husband and I renewed out vows and then my husband and my oldest daughter sang "A Household of Faith". God has brought us through so many things and I give Him all the glory and praise for what He has done. I truly want to be a vessel that He can use to help others. So today, along with you, I am rededicating my life to Him. He is truly my best friend and He knows me better than anyone else. My desire is to get closer to Him.

He has given me a very special gift but I have to be very careful how I use that gift and I have to be very sure that I am listening to Him and follow His leading. When you pray just ask God to help me.
Thanks for sharing your heart today, it truly has blessed me.
Luv u, and I'm so glad for your friendship,

Chatty Kelly said...

I LOVE THAT SONG - and your sweet heart. Jesus loves you so much Lea, and he must certainly would have died for just you if you were the only one. He loves you that much. I'm so thankful that we all have that love from him, and I pray that he creates a new heart in all of us!

Create in me a new heart O Lord,
and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from thy presence
Take not thy Holy Spirit from me.
Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation
so I may worship thee!

Yolanda said...

I asked the Lord just this morning to bring about a change and let it begin with ME.


Laurie Ann said...

Praising the Lord for your rededication to Him, Lea. I loved this post!

Anne Marie said...

Well Hi! I really liked my "first impression" over here on your blog today....Catholic? Protestant? can't really tell, but I know that you are Christian!
That was a wonderful prayer...and I think that we'll have lots more things to talk about!!

Denise said...

This made me cry, you are so precious my friend. God bless you sweetly for rededicating your life to Him. I love you.

Cottage Rose said...

Dear Lea; What a beautiful Post. I so enjoyed reading it. I too feel the same as you do.. It is such a joy to see how the Lord works in my every day life. He gives me such strength.

God bless;

Farm Chick Paula said...

This was such a wonderful post, dear Lea- you have such a beautiful heart for God!

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